Yesterday we discussed Decorum (HERE), the need to maintain order in Business Meetings, and the Robert’s Rules of Order “Committee on Discipline” when certain members & other parties refuse to maintain decorum.

[NOTE: What excites us the most about a Committee on Discipline is the ability to calmly and rationally … over time … allow folks to have an opportunity to investigate actions and expose purposeful LIES & manipulation … and stop it! It will be work, but it is necessary if we want to change things for the better!]

But maintaining decorum does not mean we blindly avoid confrontation and just give the other side everything they want just so they will shut-up. That is not the answer because like spoiling children, it will only get worse and worse over time.

And consider this … is avoiding controversy and giving in to self-interested bullies what has really gotten our Country in the mess it is in today? Think about it, and we think you will agree.

Common Myth:

Confrontation = Bad

For most of us, confrontation is not something we seek. We are not used to it, and we are not comfortable engaging in confrontation … or even watching confrontation, especially confrontation on the local level.

It is easier to watch folks “far away” in Washington DC engaging in confrontation … and sometimes we actually like it … but when it is at a local Party meeting, among people you personally know and run into at the grocery store … that confrontation is hard to stomach and many people JUST WANT IT TO STOP … no matter what the cost!!!

See how we got in this mess … by avoiding confrontation when self-interested “bullies” are insisting on their way?

Think about the politician who won’t stop arguing his point because he is getting “paid” somehow on the backend. We end up just giving him what he wants to get him to shut-up … but in the long run … after 250 years of doing so … look where we are today.

Confrontation = Seeking TRUTH

Confrontation is not bad … especially if we maintain decorum. In fact, like it or not, confrontation is a necessity if we want to maintain our Republic for future generations.

Instead of looking at confrontation as “arguing” … consider it as SEEKING TRUTH. Maybe the other party has a legitimate difference of opinion. Maybe they do not have the experience or knowledge about a matter … so they voice an opinion that to some of us makes no sense whatsoever. Or maybe they have an ulterior motive. Or maybe you are wrong and can learn something yourself.

Whatever the case … SEEK TRUTH!!! Don’t be rushed to judgement … and just give them what they want (HERE) … calmly and rationally discuss the issue and SEEK TRUTH!!!

As we teach … don’t get mad, keep calm and JUST SMILE!!! If the other party is nefarious and has an ulterior motive they won’t like you smiling and calmly discussing the matter … so let them EXPOSE themselves.

Remember, other folks are quietly watching and listening … making up their own minds on who to believe. So when truth is on your side, be persistent, but always be PROFESSIONAL.

UNDERSTANDING THE “GAMES” PEOPLE PLAY: In a group of 124 SC House Members … 46 State Senators … or 151 Precinct ECs (like we have here in Greenville) … not everybody needs to come up to the microphone and speak their mind … there isn’t enough time in the 2 or 4 year term to do that … but as leaders YOU DO HAVE A RESPONSIBILITY to learn and understand what is going on.

CONTINUING PROFESSIONAL DEVELOPMENT: There are lots of educational tools out there to understand how to deal with “confrontation” … whether you are personally at the microphone participating … of if it is just learning to cope with your friends engage in confrontation at a local meeting.

Google “confrontation” and read some of the self-help materials. We can all learn something.

Know too that leaders have a responsibility to understand these things whether you are a SC House Rep or State Senator … or a Precinct EC or President. If you want to be a leader … then be a leader and LEARN!!!

Talk with all sides … trust no one … and “watch what they DO, not what they SAY.”

#Learn&GROW!!!